This is a women who amazes me and inspires me. That really is an understatement. I have felt connected with this organization since the day I met Robin. In 1999 when I was home preparing for the birth of my first son Preston, she was boarding an airplane. Heading to rural villages in Honduras to seek out deaf children who needed a voice, who needed understanding, who needed Jesus.
Any signing mom’s want to go down with me someday??
One of my sweet friends Jacqui (I actually met through this blog) were talking about what Luke’s language looks like at this point. How is he at home?? This is a little excerpt from that conversation.
Luke is saying a lot of words but now comes the hard part, connecting them on his own. This is very hard. Right now impossible. It seems he is making an attempt at almost anything I say to him. He can connect two to three word little combos on his own. But much after that is me scripting each sentence for him one word at a time. Some words are very clear, some are not. Some little things he is catching on that people say around here. Like today it was, “Oh my gosh” Luke hears big brother say it then he repeats it. It is like having a one year old maybe one and a half (language wise) in the house. The kids go Luke say this, say that, and try to teach him things to say, sometimes naughty. That stage when kids will just say whatever they are told to say and everyone thinks it’s cute even if it’s a bad word. It is still so hard!!! I feel very bad for him because he has so much on his mind and I just can’t wait for him to be able to express himself. Some times two word phrases are not enough. I can never really hear the whole story. Just one little word to describe the hundreds he is thinking about. I see it in his eyes sometimes. It breaks my heart. But one day at a time my friend, that is all we can do. I am trying my best. I will script all day and all night for him, he’ll get it.
One year was spent helping Luke get those feet off the ground.
You go Luke!
This is the first time in a year and a half of therapy Luke has ever cried over a toy. When it was time for his therapist to go he had a melt down. He just kept saying, “Lady Bug, Lady Bug!” I guess they were pretty cool. Each bug came in three parts. They snapped together. They each had a number and an equal number of dots on their back.They were challenging to pull apart. You could stack them up. Good for counting and motor skills. Luke enjoyed thinking out side the box and creating wild mixed up bugs, then he would pull them all apart and match them by color again. His therapist said this was very good. He was challenging himself and thinking for himself. I think I’m going to have to buy him a set of these. They are made by learning resources. I was just visiting their website. Wow, they have a lot of really cool stuff. www.learningresources.com
Snap and learn number bugs
So here’s an easy fine motor activity. It only requires pipe cleaners and straws. Luke made Lily some bracelets while she was gone to school. I helped him cut up the straws and he threaded the bits of straws on to the pipe cleaners. He was really excited to give her the bracelets when she got home.
One year ago today was Luke’s first trip to speech therapy. I remember crying painful tears all the way home. So many thoughts went through my head. How would our family get through this? How would I make this drive? Will my son ever talk? What went wrong this time around? If only I had been more assertive at Luke’s birth. I told everyone I didn’t blame myself, but I did. Did I take for granted my pregnancy? What if he never talks? Will Luke use sign language for the rest of his life? Why did this happen? Was God mad at me? Is this for all those times I turned my back and did what ever I wanted? How does the story end? How does the story end? How does the story end?
Today I am celebrating my birthday with tears in my eyes, but they are not stinging. They come with joy. Luke has come a very long way in the past year but it is so much more than that. There are things in life you can never explain unless you walk through it. There are lessons God allows us to experience. I feel privileged. Yes, privileged that God has put this in my lap. It has molded me and refined me. I see things very differently today than I did a year ago. God is not a punisher, He is a deliverer! He does not turn His back on us, He holds us! He is not a destroyer, He sustains, refines, and replenishes us! He whispers, I love you Jen no matter what.
Do I know how the story ends? No. Do I care? Not really. Do I know how well my son will ever speak? No but God has a perfect plan. Have I let go of trying to be in control? Yes, because I know I never will be. Have I learned how to Love? Yes, because He first loved me. Have I learned how to live for today? Yes, tomorrow may never come.
All I wanted for my birthday was to finish this project I’ve been working on. And guess what? I did it. I hope this will help other parents searching for answers. Apraxia was a word I had never heard of in my life.
Luke is so funny. He usually sits by the front window and waits for his therapist to arrive at our house with “the toys!” When he sees the mini van pull up he squeals. Just a couple fun things we did this week.
Jumping, balance, then he had to catch a ball at the same time.
Luke has thrived with all the help and support he has received through Inland Regional Center/ Early start program. They have provided him with speech therapy twice a week, an occupational therapist once a week, and a play therapist once a week. Four days a week of therapy! I have watched him work hard at mastering areas that he once had trouble with. It is amazing what can be accomplished. I was talking to his wonderful play therapist, Cindy. She has been such a support for me all the way along. Always bringing me books, sharing stories with me, putting a little pressure on me when I needed a push. I can’t tell you the ways she has impacted Luke’s life. She continuously reminds me that in all her years of experience she never counts anything out. She has worked with children that were told they would never see, with visual stimulation and therapy, she has watched eyes improve. This just amazes me. Learning to see?? Wow! Children born with some of the most serve problems, turn around and lead a perfectly normal lives. I will never forget her story of a boy she helped for years and years that she believes had severe Apraxia like Luke. It just was not diagnosed as that back then. His family was told he was mentally impaired. No one could understand him. She knew differently. She stood by his side and helped him through many things, even helped him pass his driving test in high school. Last time she talked to him he was studying to become an underwater welder!
Well, I am a believer. A believer that all things are possible. A believer in spirit and soul. I hear people say they don’t think God is in the business of performing miracles anymore. I don’t think they are looking very hard.
Another day on the road to speech therapy. My sweet little niece Jenna came with us today. This was her last time for a while. She’s back to school on Monday. We will miss her. Luke enjoys her company very much. One of his many partners in crime.
She drew this of Luke. In case you can't see it. It says, I love my mom and Dad so much I will never go to College!
She is such a sweetie. Thanks for going Jen- Jen. I see artist in your future or maybe speech therapist helping children like Luke?? Now get ready for third grade, it’s gonna be so fun!
